Archive for the ‘Coping Tips’ Category

When They Leave…..

Sunday, July 26th, 2009

I trust I don’t have to tell you how to behave when your Significant Other gets home.

On the other hand, when your time is up with your partner and s/he is leaving you’d better have a plan for what to do when that door snicks shut and you are standing there alone.

For some, leaving the house before he leaves helps. After all, we come home all the time to an empty house. Leaving first: whether to run errands, go the gym, or take the kids to the park, makes it easier to come home to an empty house.

If leaving before he does doesn’t appeal or isn’t practical, then I’d strongly recommend you know exactly what you plan to do the minute s/he leaves. I found this particularly critical in those first separations.

Otherwise you’ll probably end up in a heap on the bed crying your eyes out. Or worse, doing what I did the first few months of our separation: drowning my sorrows in a pint (or a few) of Ben & Jerry’s anything Chocolate. This of course added an extra 10 pounds in my hip area which only irritated me further.

Some of my perennial favorite things to “take my mind off” are:
1. Read a book I’ve been looking forward to
2. Go to the gym
3. Treat myself to ice cream (if I go purchase a scoop I can control the portion size)
4. Go to a movie
5. Play on Facebook (or your social network of choice)
6. Garden
7. Watch my favorite movie or TV series on DVD
8. Call a friend and chat
9. Have a “date” with a friend set up for shopping, coffee, dinner
10. Work on whatever is my current hobby: writing, scrapbooking, making holiday presents, etc.

Having a fallback list of “Things to Do” helps to ease the pain of the separation, and gives me something to look forward to.

Actually doing one of these things helps me transition back into my life, away from my husband.

I’d love any words of advice you have on how you navigate the road from being a couple to being a single. What have you got?

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